And we’re back with some more outrageous and hilarious humour. Today, it ranges from dirty thoughts to divorce and from guilty doctors to church drunkards, so here are some great chuckles to keep your week going and your day flowing.
After a man told his wife that black underwear turned him on, she decided to stop washing his boxers.
A man called the offices of his wife’s divorce lawyer and said, “Can I speak to my wife’s lawyer please?”
The receptionist replied, “I’m sorry but he died last week.” He phoned again the next day and asked the same question. The receptionist said, “I told you yesterday, that he died last week.” The next day the man called again and asked to speak to his wife’s lawyer. By this point the receptionist had become very annoyed and said, “I’ve already told you that your wife’s lawyer died last week, why do you keep calling?” The man answered: “I just love hearing that.”
A doctor had sex with one of his patients, and he felt guilty the next day. No matter how hard the tried to forget about it, the shame and sense of betrayal were overwhelming. But every once in a while he would hear a reassuring voice in his head that said “Don’t worry about it. You aren’t the first medical practitioner to have sex with one of his patients.” But then he would hear another voice, one that jolted him back to reality; “You are a sick bastard,” it whispered, “and a terrible veterinarian.”
A man walked into church on crutches. He stopped in front of the holy water, splashed some of it on his legs and then tossed aside his crutches. The altar boy witnessed the event and ran to tell the priest what he’d just seen. The priest said, “Son, you’ve just witnessed a miracle. Tell me, where is this man?” The alter boy replied “Lying on the floor next to the holy water”